I was hanging out on Twitter a while back and came across this article about how Pot Lucks make this blogger panic. The title of the article caught my attention because, well, they make me panic too. Although it’s for a different reason than the other blogger.

Pot luck dinners are always so stressful for us as a family dealing with food allergies. There are several issues we have to confront when facing a pot luck.  To the non-food allergic parents I look like a crazy overprotective parent who doesn’t think everyone else’s food is good enough for MY child.  To the parents of children who have food allergies – well, you understand don’t you?  I’d rather look like a nut than have my child accidentally eat one and possibly…Die!

Here are my top reasons to avoid Pot Luck Dinners when dealing with a food allergy.

• Pot Luck Convenience is non-existent –  I can’t just make one dish and bring it like everyone else.  Why?  Well, that’s the only thing my allergic kids will be able to eat, and who can only eat one thing at a Pot Luck??!!??  I have to make atleast an entree, side, and dessert.

• I have to be the spoon monitor – Even if I exercise due diligence and make food that my kiddos can eat that is all null and void once a spoon from one dish is used in my allergy-safe dish.  I have to watch my dishes like a mama hawk to make sure that doesn’t happen before their plates are fixed.

• No Yummy, New, Exciting Dishes for My Kiddos – This is more difficult for my 10 yr old than his younger brother because he’s into more foods, but it’s really a bummer for him when he loves to try new things.

• I risk hurting people’s feelings – If I went to a larger church this might not be such an ordeal since no one pays attention to what you’re putting on  your (or your kid’s) plate in a larger environment.  However, I often have very dear, well meaning people coming up to let me know that their dish is safe for my kids.  They’ll say things like “It’s ok, it doesn’t have milk, only cheese” 0r some variation like that.  Call me paranoid, but if I haven’t read it for myself then they aren’t eating it.  I explain this as nicely as possible.

So what can you do as a food allergy parent to make pot luck easier?

• Definitely go!  Don’t just stay home due to food allergies.  We have to teach our little ones to experience life safely with their food allergies – not avoid it!
• Bring “Safe” dishes for your child to eat so they can still eat from the pot luck, but avoid allergens.
• Have your “speech” ready so you can easily give an answer to others who are only trying to help by offering their dishes to your allergic child.
• Enjoy & try to relax!

Photo Credit

Once upon a time, oh maybe about 9 years or more ago, I would have looked at the above scene with delight.  The first thing I’d go for is a Reese’s Cup.

Oh how I miss those!

I remember the thrill of going out trick-or-treating with my siblings and coming back home with the loot.  We used to take for granted something so small as being able to enjoy it without reading labels.

Having children with deadly food allergies has put things into a different perspective.  What once gave me warm fuzzy feelings now gives me a feeling of dread and apprehension.During this time of year store owners everywhere are offering my kiddos candy.   It’s EVERYWHERE!!

Having strangers dig their hands through a bowl of peanut containing candy to find a “safe” candy for my child is just not practical.  Packages can tear open and residue can trickle out onto otherwise “safe” candy.

A common scene while checking out at the grocery store – “would you like a piece of candy?”.  This very well meaning question causes anxiety for me, the mom of children with deadly food allergies.  I have to ask the question(and sound like overprotective food allergy mom) – Do you have the package?  Can I read it?

In most cases I have to politely decline explaining that my sons have food allergies, and that it could kill them..yada yada yada.  I then get the looks – they look at my son with pity.  They look at me with suspicion –   Poor kid, his mom won’t let him have candy.

It’s not only Trick or Treating and Grocery Shopping that’s unsafe either.  Many churches have Fall festivals this time of year and there is candy everywhere – Snickers, M&M’s, Reese’s Cups, and so on and so on.  All of which are dangerous for my kiddo.

To those who provide candy to children during this time of year I have a suggestion.  It’s ok to have the grab bowl of candy for the kiddos with whatever yummy treats you desire!

BUT…What about this?

• Buy a bag of Dum Dums, Smarties, or Skittles just for the Food Allergy Kiddos
• Keep it in the original packaging so the overprotective food allergy mom can read it and approve it!
• Allow the kiddo to reach into the bag & grab it for him/herself.

This small gesture would help me and my kiddos enjoy this fun time of year so much more!

How do you handle food allergies during this time of year?  I’d love to hear your suggestions!